Saturday, 24 October 2009

Alternate History - A Piece of Random Whimsy

For millenia the earth has been plagued by a constant ongoing war. Since the dawn of time, two implacable enemies have fought for supremacy throughout the world. Never satisfied with anything but total victory, and never irrevocably defeated, these two foes have warred down the ages. They are cats and dogs.

The cats have long had as their headquarters the land of Egypt. Indeed, at a certain point in their history, they were the rulers of this land, claimed as divine. From Egypt, they made slow inroads into Europe, where dogs held sway.

The dogs have long held the European heartland. Though attempting to make inroads themselves into the Egyptian feline home with such creative religious syncretisms as the deity Anubis (a blatant copying of the cats' initial strategy), the canines were held in acclaim and affection under successive empires, culminating in that of the French.

It was during the peak of French civilisation that the dogs felt that at last they were ready to take on the cats in their home territory. So, styling a puppet conqueror called Napoleon, a face to unite the masses and behind which they could hide their true purpose, they launched the invasion, a gargantuan effort to bring the long war to its close and ensure total victory.

It was a brutal and vicious campaign. Truly, the dogs' ambitions were great. But in the end, their reach exceeded their grasp and they were defeated, as the cats of Egypt called in the unexpected aid of the British tabby.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Son't forget the oriental cats already geting the East hed in their paws.

Oh, and welcome back